You know, my blog has been titled "Growing Up: Life As I Live It" and its been based on the progression of my life and expressing how and when I go through things but I actually remember the exact moment I grew up... the moment I realized the world wasn't beautiful fields and flowers. It was September 11,2001.
I was seven years old and in first grade. It was a regular day at school... I remember the exact place I was sitting when one of the high school students in my school came in and informed my teacher that something had happened. Right then and there, I perceived that something was very wrong. I didn't, for a second, think that it had to do with someone in or something pertaining to the school. I remember the mood of the room instantly turning to deep gloom and almost despair. It was then that the director of my school came in and told us that we'd be going home early because something awful had happened to our country. The student who informed us announced the awful tragedy had taken place...
Being seven years old, I really didn't know how to react. I didn't,couldn't, actually wrap my mind around the idea that the crashing of these planes devastated the lives of so many and our country. I didn't know what true evil was. I'd never known or experienced it...I was so naive in my mind. I had the mindset of a child.
Before we were sent home, we prayed together. I watched as many of the upperclassmen and teachers bombarded the heavenlies with pleas for safety and wisdom and comfort for the country and its leaders. I can see the seven year old version of me, standing there wide-eyed and shocked, not knowing what to think or feel.
We took two kids home so they could be with their family and were invited into there family room to watch the events unfold on their television screen. At that instant, when I saw what really happened, I witnessed complete panic, shock...fear of the people in New York City, I was no longer seven years old. It was at that exact moment that my eyes were opened to the evils of this world. It was then that I realized that the world wasn't safe and there were people so sick in their mind that they would commit such vulgar acts. I remember seeing the planes crash into the towers and the network replaying it over and over to the point where I couldn't watch anymore. I was too scared...confused.
That day, our country was forced to its knees. We were forced as individuals and as a united nation to look evil in the face. Our president had to decide how we would react to the despicable acts committed against our sovereign nation.
Today on the tenth anniversary of that fateful day, as I watch the memorials and I see the families of those who lost their loved ones, my heart breaks all over again. It breaks for what they lost but also for what I lost...It was as if my childhood was over. I could no longer go through my life as a child without cares or concerns. I was afraid of any man who looked like the nightmarish pictures I'd seen on the news that day... Fear was instilled into my heart and life. Awareness took place of innocence.Naivety was snatched away from me.
I'll always remember that day always. Where I was... How I felt....How my life and lives of so many others, were turned upside down, to never ever be the same.
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