I stopped talking to guys (not because I got a boyfriend)

And here's what happened.

I don't really know what happened. I had just returned home from three weeks in the most beautiful place -Greece- I've seen so far. I met amazing people, including two young men who I shared equally memorable times with, and honestly, home could never really compare. Home was like wearing an old pair of sneakers after I had just purchased the pair I'd been eyeing for a few months.
To try and relive some of the fun times I had abroad, my sister and I spent a night out in the city which turned out to be a bust when again my comparisons of my Greek experiences could not be topped by the less than gentlemanly& mature men who came a dime a dozen in my home city. I did give it a valiant effort.. I even gave my number to a rando in the mall, but after one too many shallow, dead-end conversations had been had, something clicked and I knew I had to make a major change.

First, I blocked, deleted, DTR'd, and straight up ghosted any and EVERY possibility. I'm talking randos, old flames, new flames...EVERYONE.

Then, I deleted all dating apps. (I was on Coffee Meets Bagel and Bumble at the time)

Finally, I told my closest friends what I was up to so I couldn't take everything back on a lonely night when I'd watched one too many rom-coms.

I wish I could say that was the end of the story BUT true to form, I rebounded.

I don't know how either! I was in such a good place. My mind was clear, sharp even, and I was focused on becoming my best self and all types of other inspirational girl quote empowerment stuff. I went paddleboarding?! I started acting like I was dating myself and it was working.

I think this new healthy, whole me who didn't need no man knew I didn't need anyone but acknowledged that I definitely still wanted someone.

SO what did I do but start nonstop snapping an old flame turned /platonic ex/ kind of friend guy..

MISTAKE.

But right after I relapsed and he immediately ghosted me I took a few days to beat myself up, lick my wounds, and got right back on the horse. No boys. Nada. Zilch.

Since then I have stood strong. Honestly, there isn't temptation at this point. No one on the horizon and no one in the rear view. They've all long ago moved on and maybe it took seeing that to finally do so myself.

ALL of that to say that I am for the first time since I was 12 or 13 ENTIRELY single. I am not thinking about anyone and I am completely content.

I think my life circumstances have ultimately led me to this. I just finished school. I am figuring myself out outside the confines of institutional regulation and a severe dating culture. But rather than  wishing for something I've never had I began to embrace what I did and the reward has been tremendous.

These are my experiences. Different. Specific. But hopefully relatable. If you're the token single girl or the broken hearted looking for someone to make you whole again, I hope you can find solace in these words. Our day will come to be in love and take all those obnoxious instas with bae, but our day is now to be as free, adventurous, and curious as possible. I'm so glad I decided to stop squandering this time because tbh I'm having the time of my life.